Skip to Content

5 Weird Things Money Can’t Buy on Cruises (That I’d Pay For If I Could)

I’ve been on lots of cruises but even amongst the never-ending list of extras you can pay for, there are a few money can’t buy things that I’d love on a cruise!

These things are very specific, but I don’t think I’d be the only person who would like them.

Pay as You Go – BATHS!

Imagine you’ve spent the whole day having fun on the beach or walking around the city. You come back to your room, wanting nothing more than to relax, but then you remember there’s no bath. Sure, showers work, but lying in a warm, bubbly bath is the BEST! It cannot be beaten.

In the past, I’ve taken cycling excursions and other physical things, and afterwards I really missed the bath.

There are baths on cruise ships but usually only in the suites which can cost a lot of money. I don’t want to pay an extra $500 for a suite, but I would love to pay $10 for a bath!

I imagine they’d have to be in the spa or somewhere, a little private bath pod. Fabulous!

cruise ship bath

Toast, Made in My Cabin

Having breakfast in bed is great when you’re in the middle of the sea but it’s not so great when your toast gets cold by the time you get back from the buffet to your room.

Most cruise lines do offer room service but even still, the toast is never as hot as I’d like it. It’s just impossible!

My dream would be that I could make my own toast in my cabin, toast is all I want for breakfast and it’s just a small thing but I’d love it.

In reality, you’d never be allowed an actual toaster in the cruise ship cabin because of the fire risk. Perhaps something else could be invented that would heat bread but without any fire risk?

I’m not sure, but I’d pay for it if it existed!

A Vending Machine Drinks Package

When I cruise I usually buy a soft drinks or soda package. I don’t drink enough alcohol to make the alcoholic packages worth it but I do drink quite a few soft drinks per day on a cruise.

Drinks Packages Aren’t Worth it For Me – Here’s How I Decide (Price Lists & More)

When you have a drinks package you USUALLY still have to go to the bar to get a drink, which can be a bit annoying when it’s busy and you just want a can of Pepsi.

On some cruise lines, they do have self-serve soda machines which are good, but I’d like to take this even further.

There are plenty of cruise ship vending machines around ships and I’d love a package that allowed me to get drinks from them anytime. Even outside of the bar operating hours!

p&o iona atrium emma cruises drink of pepsi

Many cruise line drinks packages don’t include cans, just fountain soda so having cans would be a real treat in itself.

A HUGE Cat Cafe – Inside and Outside

One of the main things I miss when I cruise is my cat Hudson so I would pay good money for a cat cafe onboard.

Cruise ships are increasingly adding including outside spaces like gardens so it would be possible to create a massive cat cafe, perhaps even a cat deck where the cats can wander inside and outside the deck.

Me and my gorgeous Hudson!

They’d have to be well looked after of course, you wouldn’t want to lose any and definitely wouldn’t want any cats getting seasick.

This one isn’t practical, but I’d pay for it if it existed!

There is already one famous cat called Bug Naked who lives onboard a cruise ship with his captain owner Captain Kate. She seems happy.

An Anti-Static Button

I don’t know what is it about cruise ships but some of them are SO STATIC. I’ve been on a couple of ships where I’ve received 10+ static shocks every single day, no matter what shoes I’m wearing and what other hacks I try.

I once took a cruise on a ship where the carpets were made of recycled fishing nets, I couldn’t avoid the static, I was nervous about touching anything!

I don’t know if it’s possible, but if there was a pod I could go in that would take away all the static from me and guarantee I wouldn’t get any more static shocks, I’d pay for that. Perhaps $1 per anti-staticing!

It sounds like something from the future, but it would be really nice to have.

For now, I will keep dreaming. Maybe someday, there will be a cruise ship with baths you can hire in every spa, fresh toast in all rooms, easy-to-use drink vending machines, cat cafes with views of the sea, and no static shocks.

Free Insiders Cruise Line Guide

Ever wondered how the mainstream cruise lines compare? Cruise lines won’t tell you this, but I will.

This FREE guide shows you everything you need to know to find your perfect cruise line.

I'm Co-Founder of This Company!
Custom Cruise Maps

Whenever I take a cruise I order a print of my trip. It uses the real satellite data from the cruise and is always a great conversation starter!


I'm building an impressive collection...


Code EMMACRUISES will get you 10% off

The maps are available to buy for cruises back to 2015 and for any future cruises. They come in different sizes and colours. All you need to know if your cruise dates and where you started and ended, the team will work out the rest.